Homophobic RWDC Security Threatens DC Residents, Impersonates Park Police

ARWDC just received an anonymous tip from an area resident who had a bad, to put it mildly, experience with Real World DC security last night. What happened to these two individuals is awful, yet frankly, not shocking....way to go MTV and Real World DC.

Note: This is the tip in full, unedited.

"Just dialed 311 after a security guy near the street asked me and a friend to leave. We heard the cast discussing how rude people in DC were in what we think were their hottub, The police arrived. I have no problem with them protecting the property, but the guy told us he was Park Police. He reached into his back pocket and said he was our worst nightmare. He said he was going to arrest us.

That was my complaint to the MPD when they arrived after we called the non-emergency number. The security officer claimed he worked for an agency he clearly did not. He also should not have reached towards his back pocket and threatened us. Additionally, he made a homophobic comment. When I told him he was not a park policeman, he told me just because I was walking with a girl this did not mean I was straight. As I am gay this statement was true, but it was clearly intended to demean me and make me feel inferior. I asked him why he was making a homophobic comment, but he responded by continuing to insist that we leave the area.

The police arrived. The 311 operator called me back and asked if I wanted to file a report. I said I wanted to get on with my night. When my friend told me the police were leaving the scene I flagged them down. I told them what happened and said a man in a black security shirt had stated he was a park policeman. The police said they could not find him, but I returned to the scene and pointed the man out. When the police approached him and asked him if he was park police and he stated he was not.

The police told me the security were a bunch of "yahoo's". They planned to speak to the head of security.

Just so you are aware, beware if you plan to walk by and stop near S and 20th Streets, NW. Apparently, this areas if off limits until Thanksgiving."

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Remember, YOU have rights...you can walk by the house, you can stand out in front of the house. If you get harassed, call 311 just like our tipster did! If RWDC fans like DCist and Woodbridge, VA blogger Spencer can gawk, so can RWDC opponents. Just don't break any laws--we don't, our tipster didn't, and neither should you.

This is NOT a Drill: The Coming Real World Apocalypse

I am going to show you how TRWDC is poised to just utterly destroy an average Wednesday night here in Washington...I will do this in timeline form:

6:15: I arrive at typical South DuPont bar after a long day working for [REDACTED]

6:17 I order Vodka Soda number one, my friends are running a smidge late as usual, leaving me to drink at the bar by myself.

6:22 I order Vodka Soda number two

6:28 [Redacted] walks into bar and we start comparing day-war stories

6:32 I order Vodka Soda number three and walk outside for a cigarette

6:34 I light some girls cigarette outside and make a joke. She laughs.

6:39 I walk back inside and see that [Redacted] has been joined by [Redacted] We talk for a few minutes about how happy we are that Obama is President,

6:42 I order Vodka Soda number four

6:45 It finally dawns on me that cute girl from outside is sitting next to me. I turn and order her a drink

6:50 We are outside smoking a cig....I've had just enough vodka that I'm finally loose, we're having a good time, I'm starting to get excited

6:55 We go back inside and the [Redacteds] and I are talking about people we know

7:00 I order Vodka Soda number five

I've got some tolerance but now I'm starting to get tipsy...5 in and while the girl sitting next to me is talking with her friend, I decide to barge in and make a play for her number before I get TOO drunk.

7:15 I still have her laughing, this is a rare and wonderful feat for me. I order Vodka Soda number six

7:20 I don't notice, but advance guys have just walked into the place and are scoping out a table in the back.

7:30 Girl and I do a shot of Jager...I love Jager, unfortunately I always seem to take the shot when I least need it...or maybe thats every shot of Jager and I just never learn.

7:45 Girl is totally into me and the [Redacteds] have completely melted away into the background noise of the bar. I'm thinking about whether my room is clean, do I have condoms, is my roommate home.....

7:50 Girl looks towards the door and her eyes go big, an open smile then the words, "WOW this is SO exciting!!! XXX from the Real World and some cameras just walked in!!!!!!"

7:51 Jager hits me...as does the power and excitement of her words. I decide to resort to snarko-terrorism to get me out of this mess.

7:52 I say to girl, "Wow, thats awesome, last time I've seen a bar go from zero to Douchebag in under 20 seconds, I was in college."

7:52:30 Polite laugh by girl while she continues looking over my shoulder.

7:53 I order Vodka Soda number seven, I say to her, "Oh come on, you can't possibly be into that show...it lost its edge like 10 years ago."

7:54 she looks at me and says, "Actually I've always been a big fan of the show, since I started watching it when they went to Las Vegas"

7:55 I am really kinda drunk right now and I can't remember when they were in Vegas, was it, 2002? 2003? Good GOD how OLD is this girl....I ask her to show me her ID

7:56 She looks at me as though I'm a creep...which would be kinda accurate, it dawns on me she was probably fucking 16 when they were in Vegas, this both sickens me, and makes me smile

7:57 I hear the hush whispers of the [Redacteds] making fun of me while I completely strike out with this girl.

8:00 Douchbag producer walks up to girl I was talking to and hands her a release form. He tells her that Douchbag TRWDC star would love to meet her and have a few drinks with her. She smiles, looks at me, frowns, and then walks over to the TRWDC table.

8:03 I order Vodka Soda number eight, look over at my friends...they can barely contain their laughter...I let out a profane streak of cusses, pay my tab and leave. I flick off the TRW crew on the way out and think about walking up the street to piss on the house. I err on the side of keeping myself out of the drunk tank, and by consequence my job, thow myself into a cab and then make my way back to my downtown "zone 1" neighborhood.

Friends...this is the inevitable fate we have to look forward to.