Where Angels & D-bags Fear to Tread/Like The Plague: Joint Edition

Thank goodness for the Going Out Gurus or GoGs. I have used them for a loooong time to help me figure out dates, birthdays, and all around looking to have fun in this city. And they have once again come through for me.

Via Fritz, in many ways the GoG's point man from bars to art, put up a recent post regaring the bars/restaurants/music venues that he has heard from that will and will not be allowing Real World DC into their places of business.

While editorializing may go on in this post, please note the contributors to this blog support all local DC businesses.

Safehouses

The Black Cat--From the owner Dante Ferrando, "People come here to hang out and have a drink or see a concert, not be bothered by film crews." THANK YOU, DANTE! All I want to do is get my dance on to an awesome band or to BritPop music while I enjoy a Foster's Oil Can. I don't want "Woo Girls" in my face due to the RWDC going to your venue. Thank you again.

Wonderland Ballroom--Listen here, Wonderland. I like your bar. I hear the interns are going there quite a bit but I haven't seen any change. You are on the wall though regarding RWDC though seeming to fall on the NO side given your clientele. If you do let the Real World DC in your bar, you will have sold out and become poseurs. Keep Strong, Keep Being AntiRealWorld.

Russia House--Russia House is close to the RWDC House. Could they go there? Sure. I suppose so. One off-record source though doesn't think so because. She told me, "My favorite part about going to the Russia House are the amazing former Russians and their great stories. I just don't think they'd want their privacy being invaded so publicly." Avoid? Not a chance. RWDC will never go to this amazing place and I think the GoGs got this wrong.

AVOID LIKE THE PLAGUE

Cobalt--The Real World DC has approached Cobalt!?!? Shocked! As long as they don't go to Townhouse or to JRs I know I am OK. Though, the rest of my fellow homos take note that the Real World DC may be at Cobalt for Thursday nights...and you know what I mean. I'll just be at Townhouse watching everyone from the patio.

Town--As I previously predicted, the Real World DC is most likely going to Town. No shocker. THE gay dance club in town which also has quite a bit of space and decent lighting (if they desire). Going to Town and being shocked that the RWDC is there is no longer an option, you are on notice. Might I suggest one of the wonderful events that The New Gay does instead?

Saint-Ex/Bar Pilar--Okay. I've had some bad experiences at Saint-Ex. So if someone else wants to exhibit better judgement, feel free to comment. As to Bar Pilar, I highly doubt they'd go there. Bar Pilar is a swanky joint that, regardless of the number of the people there, always feels intimate. MTV doesn't want intimate....they want "quasi-sexual." That's not Bar Pilar's crowd. If RWDC goes to Bar Pilar, I'd be very...VERY surprised.

Gazuza/Chi-Cha--No offense to the comm. director for these sibling bars, but your influence has been waning in years. And yes, I know how I used the term "no offense." The fact they were in this article says to me that they need the RWDC to help them open another venue. Both places are great....but they want to occupy the catbird seat again like they once did. RWDC may go there, may not, both venues are close. I'm not going to chance going to either though.

Shadow Room--I'm not cool. I've never been here. Frankly, when I read the GoG article and the owner said, "In my industry, it's all about vanity.", I decided to never, ever go there. Good luck to all those who go there to try and get on. That's your target demographic, not mine.

Where Angels & D-bags Fear to Tread--Part I

With the impending arrival of the Real World cast and crew, DC is about to become a festering mess of douchebags and their followers....well more so.

This will be a continuing series of places where the Real World crowd will never go, and where we all can hopefully be safe from their antics. If you have an addition, post it in the comments and we will try and use it in another update.

1) The Red Derby: Located up 14th St., the Red Derby is one of the best places to enjoy good beer at great prices in a great, non-fratty atmosphere.


Why the RWers won't go there: The Derby is critically located far enough away and the Real World cast will be too lazy to go up there. Also, the neighborhood is "very scary." And by that I mean not scary at all.


2) Townhouse Tavern: A favorite hangout for people who actually know it exists and many progressive activists.


Why the RWers won't go there: If you've been there, you know that their bathrooms are only slightly better than a latrine...and that's a huge reason why regulars love it. The Real World cast would have to run home to go. Also, the Mayor of Townhouse would organize the progressives to chain themselves to the doors so no one could get in. Trust me he could do this.


3)Florida Avenue Grill: A DC institution that usually gets overshadowed by Ben's Chili Bowl. FL Ave. Grill is home to delicious diner food in an area of DC that is getting increasingly anti-septic.

Why the RWers won't go there: The glasses aren't always the cleanest, the food is packed with cholesterol, and they serve scrapple. Somehow I don't think that Britney (my imagined RWDC castmember), who grew up in a suburban wasteland full of chain restaurants, will enjoy this restaurant. Fine with me and pass the scrapple.